I Went to Snoop Dogg’s Birthday Party
and woke up the next morning looking like a NSFW cookie monster.
you can read about it here.
I Drank Margaritas With Diablo Cody
she’s really cool. duh.
read my profile here.
I Went to Las Vegas and Thought Those Were Miley’s Nipples
also, i finally figured out why i hate vegas. you can read it here.
Vic Mensa and I Got Brain Freezes on the Venice Beach Boardwalk
also, we ate bratwursts and he told me about his ballerina sister who brought home a boyfriend who sat around his parents’ house in his pajamas all day.
i really do have the best job.
here is the story.
Nylo Spent $20,000 on Food Alone Last Year
before that, she ate nothing but ramen noodles, peanut butter and water and told me, “i was just trying not to die.” now mac miller has sampled her and nas hosted her mixtape release party last night.
she has a crazy story. we went to lunch a few weeks ago and she told me the whole thing. you can read it here.
I Went Out and Did Shots With Lil Jon in Las Vegas
Lil Jon is holding a bottle of champagne like it’s his penis.
Standing on top of Surrender nightclub’s DJ booth in a white tank top and jean shorts, he pops off the top and sprays champagne into the crowd like he’s ejaculating. He positions the bottle at pelvic level until it’s dribbling its last bit of frothiness, then he reaches back, blasé, for another. He repeats this cycle two, three, maybe four times. A girl twists her torso over the barrier, neck stretched out, mouth gaped open. Jon tips the bottle, and a stream of champagne hits the mark. It’s close to 3 a.m., but this is Las Vegas.
Bottle service waitresses with flat brown bellies, fake boobs and eyelash extensions caked with mascara flit around. The air is thick with the smell of self-tanner and cologne. A guy tries to get me to flash my breasts. Another palms my ass. Another tries to lift up my dress.
Sliding down into his VIP banquet after his set, Lil Jon beckons to me. He pushes the half-full bottle of Don Julio that we had taken shots from earlier into my hand and leans into me. “Take this to your room,” he shouts in my ear. “You’re drunk.”
I don’t point out that I’m not the only one.
this probably will go down as one of the most memorable nights of my career. you can read the rest here.